It's good to be back at my blog. I have been caught up with life that I haven't had the time to sit down and pen my thoughts in my blog. But I don't want to give up on my blog. It is part of me, it is an outlet of expression and a source of satisfaction for me.
In the past few months, I had a work assignment of a few months duration. It has been good to get out of the house like normal people every day. I was back to the early morning rises, rushing to catch the Commuter Express which would take me to the bustling financial district of Downtown Los Angeles. I was always a few minutes late which meant that I had to run/walk/run in order to make sure to catch the Commuter Express bus which only came every half hour. Somehow I always managed to get to the bus stop before the bus arrived. It was partly thanks to my trusty old walking shoes and partly due to my determination to catch that bus.
The office was an exciting place mainly due to the people who worked there. The work in itself was not too difficult once I became familiar with my daily tasks. The duties of my job brought me in contact with every member of the department on a daily basis. There were certain people that I liked to see more than others. I looked forward for an excuse to talk to some people. Actually there was one person in particular that I liked to talk to. Incidentally he was a man, you could say he was my secret crush. I actually didn't notice him so much at first.
Then all of a sudden it hit me. It happened because one day he came over to my cubicle to ask me a question about work and then and he asked me where I was from. I said I'm from Sri Lanka and then we had a long chat about Sri Lanka, about it's languages, races and religion. He is East Asian and he said he was raised as a Christian but his ancestors had been Buddhist. As we talked I began to like him more and more and I hoped he liked me the same way.
Anyway to cut a long story short I used to see him now and then at various places at work i.e. in the lunch room, break room or at his desk for work related matters. Each time I saw him we used to talk, it was easy to talk to him as he was so outgoing. I am a shy person but with an outgoing person I find it easy to talk. Everytime we talked I kept wondering 'does he like me?'
There was no doubt that I liked him and I wanted him to like me as more than a friend. However, with him the reason that he talked to me was I think, due to his personality, he was a naturally friendly person and liked to talk. When I went to his desk to give him a document he used to greet me smilingly and ask how I was, how my work was , how my day was. Each time, I was very happy to talk to him, be in his company and share some conversation. I wanted to go upto his desk just to say hi but refrained from doing so as I didn't want people to think that I was just going there to talk to him.
Then finally I knew my time there was ending and in the final two weeks I used to go upto talk to him just for the sake of talking. I no longer cared what people thought as I would not be there much longer. I told him that I would be leaving and he began to discuss with me what my plans were next in my career path and give me some advise. I did invite him out for lunch just before I left and he took me to a nice restaurant, but he didn't try to learn more about me all he did was give me more advise on my next career move. During our prior conversations, he had asked me if I was single or married and I had told him I was single. He had also told me that he was single. I really wanted to ask him what type of woman he was looking for. But I felt awkward and afraid of what he might think if I asked him that question. Our lunch was so nice, it felt so special to share his company but the time was too short.
I have his contact number and email and he has mine. In fact we spoke once after I left as he wanted to see how I was doing. But, I feel he only likes me as a friend and he enjoyed our conversations but that was that. In anycase I am glad to have met him, I enjoyed our moments together as friends although I wished for more. I feel like I met a good person. When you meet good people that you like, it inspires you also to emulate them and try to improve your own life. He is a member of a strict Christian denomination whose Church he recommended that I attend not only for the religon but also for fellowship with good people. Although I am interested in learning about other faiths, at this stage in my life I have come to a point in my beliefs where I feel like I cannot abandon Buddhism for another faith.
I want to go and meet him again for a lunch in the future and I will try my best to ask him what he wants in his mate, so at least I have an idea whether or not I meet his ideal.
